Death.  You fear it and do everything in your power not to think about it until one you love crosses the veil before you.  Suddenly, you no longer fear death.  You long for it.  But not really.  What you want is release from suffering.  What you want is your old life back.  What you want is to be with your loved one again.  What you want is change.  You do not really want death, for within you is LIFE.  Within you is the breath of life which pulls you ever onward, ever upward toward greater experiences of love.  These await you whether here or in the hereafter.  Trust the process.  Grief comes and goes in waves.  Sorrow comes and goes in waves.  And in between?  Beneath it all?  The unchanging Joy of being Love In Full Expression.  Death comes to all eventually.  In the meantime, live fully.  Love what is:  The very fullness of being. 

You are so very loved.

***