Unfinished business … Interactions with those closest to us can be challenging when they’re out in the open, but unresolved issues can fester for years, if not lifetimes.  These can cover the spectrum from hurt feelings or broken hearts to loving words or praise left unsaid when a loved one passes.  Guilt and regret can feel like a stone on the chest adding to the grief for those left behind. 

The Shift Network’s Ancestral Healing Summit will show that it’s possible to take care of unfinished business across time and space with someone who has passed.  I’m honored to be part of this summit in which I’ll share examples from my work as a medium of the kind of healing that can happen quite quickly when one learns to communicate soul to soul.

Often, when people consult with a medium, they tend to think only in terms of their personal opportunity to say things they didn’t say before their loved one’s transition.  What many don’t realize is that a medium serves an equally important role as a mouthpiece for those who no longer have a physical voice.  The eagerness to enjoy clear communication extends to both sides of the veil.

In a medium’s role as an intermediary between dimensions, we discover that there are often similar messages from those in spirit as those still in physical form.  After validating the deceased’s continued existence with verifiable evidence, the most common communication is the assurance by those across the veil that all is well in the reality in which they find themselves … that they are content and gratified, if not surprised, to find that they can still see and visit with their family members at will. 

“I’m right here!” they insist, “and I hear you talking to me even if you don’t sense me.”

During a reading, a declaration of love from across the veil may seem generic to one who is skeptical.  This is why in an evidential reading, such important messages are book-ended with details about the person’s life that the medium couldn’t possibly know. To hear “I always loved you and I always will,” and to discover that love truly is eternal is healing balm to a sitter’s grieving heart. 

But what about those who were never able to express their love while on the earthly plane?  And what about those who uttered words they wish they had never said?  It is these emotional reunions across dimensions that carry the greatest healing potential.

Cases of ancestors who wish to make amends are so common that spirits use a meaningful symbol with me to indicate an apology is due.  The person in spirit appears in my mind’s eye with their head humbly bowed.  In answer to my silent inquiry, they then divulge the issue for which they are asking forgiveness.  The revelation of highly personal details which may have been kept secret by both parties can leave a sitter stunned.  Yet, the healing that results from these emotion-filled afterlife apologies can be profound.

The same goes for thank-you’s when I see the symbol of the person in spirit reaching out a beseeching hand accompanied by a powerful heart-opening.  Whether or not the deceased loved one ever expressed their gratitude while still in a body, these displays of compassion during a reading can produce therapeutic tears from even the most stoic sitter. 

I often advise people somewhat tongue in cheek not to wait until you need a medium to clear up disagreements.  When we understand that hurt people hurt people, and that human beings learn by trial and error, it is much easier to make amends while we can still do so face-to-face. 

Once freed of the body, which cloaks our soul awareness, those who pass find themselves aware of the thoughts and feelings of those around them.  Nothing is hidden.  They hear your unspoken thoughts as well, and with the bigger picture of the soul’s perspective, they understand your human motivations.   This is why they are equally grateful when their family members sit with a medium through whom they can more clearly issue their thank you’s and apologies.  

In truth, it is never too late to say what needs to be said, and you don’t need an intermediary to connect across the veil.  The spirit world is not some far-off place.  It interpenetrates our own.  It only appears separate when masked by beliefs, human conditioning, and the busy brain’s filters.

Communication is possible with your ancestors because, like them, you are also a soul here and now.  By learning to shift your awareness to your essential nature, you can gain their big picture view.  Such a shift in perspective can be life-changing.

If you have some human issues with loved ones who have passed that still need to be resolved, move your awareness to the heart and with heart-felt intention, say whatever needs saying.  You need not speak aloud.  Know that your love or even your anger is felt and welcomed.  And then, having bared your soul, consciously release whatever has been weighing heavy on your heart. 

Those in the higher spirit realms know each other by their light.  They identify us the same way.  Your loved ones in spirit see you now with the eyes of the soul.  By taking care of unfinished business, you allow more of your soul’s light to shine and make it easier to sense the presence of love.